You Can't Blame Yourself
by suzie2b
Summary: Moffitt is injured and Tully feels it's his fault.


**Disclaimer:** _ **The Rat Patrol**_ **is not my property. They come out to play sometimes, then I send them home.**

 **You Can't Blame Yourself**

 **By Suzie2b**

 **When Tully realized that Moffitt had taken a hit he pulled up and over a dune for cover. He helped the sergeant out of the back of the jeep and eased him down onto the ground as he lost consciousness.**

 **Tully grabbed a med kit out of the jeep and knelt next to Moffitt. He opened the blood soaked shirt to quickly examine the bullet wound in the sergeant's chest before getting gauze and applying pressure. Tully whispered, "Hang in there, sarge."**

 **He could hear the skirmish as Troy and Hitch tried to drive off the German column. Tully listened to the sounds of the fight for several minutes, then he checked Moffitt's wound. It had stopped bleeding. Tully reached for the med kit to get what was needed for a field dressing when he noticed it had gotten quiet. Then he heard it … a wet, sucking sound. He looked down at Moffitt and realized the sergeant had a sucking chest wound.**

 **Moving quickly, Tully started rummaging through the back of the jeep looking for the plastic that Charley had wrapped some cookies in for him. "Where is it? I thought I put it…" Then he remembered he'd put it in the glove box.**

 **Tully smoothed the plastic out and made sure it was as clean as possible before placing it over the wound. He then taped it down on three sides. There wasn't anything else he could do. Moffitt needed a doctor. "I'm so sorry, sarge. This is my fault."**

 **Then Tully heard the jeep come up and over the dune. Troy and Hitch were quickly at Tully's side. Troy looked at Tully's handiwork and asked, "What happened out there?"**

 **Tully continued to stare at the wounded sergeant and said, "I messed up. I thought I could get between the two halftracks, but I didn't see that the third had circled around behind me until it was too late. By the time I got us out of there…"**

 **Troy pulled the private to his feet. "We all take the same chances, Tully. You can't start blaming yourself when things go wrong." He saw the grief in the younger man's eyes and said, "Let's get Moffitt to a field hospital."**

 **Hitch already had a map out and said, "According to this the closest hospital is about thirty-two kilometers from here. It'll take less than an hour, but do you think Moffitt can make it that far in a jeep?"**

" **We don't have a choice."**

 **##########################**

 **At the field hospital, Troy, Hitch, and Tully waited in the mess tent for word about Moffitt. Troy and Hitch sipped coffee, and Tully paced as he said, "It's been hours. You'd think they'd be done by now. Maybe I should…"**

 **As the private passed by, Troy reached out and grabbed Tully by the wrist. He pulled him down onto the bench and said, "Sit down. You're going to wear a trench in the floor. Someone will let us know when he's out of surgery."**

 **Tully put his elbows on the table and put his head in his hands. "Moffitt's gonna be okay, isn't he, sarge?"**

 **Troy sighed. "I hope so. The fact that they're still working on him tells us he's still alive."**

 **Hitch was worried about his friend. "You've got to quit beating yourself up, Tully. This isn't your fault."**

 **Tully didn't look up as he said, "I should've seen what was happening out there. I should've pulled back and regrouped."**

" **You can't see the future. You couldn't have known what was going to happen."**

 **Tully looked at Hitch with hard eyes. "It's my job to know…"**

 **A doctor walked into the mess tent, interrupting the conversation. He got a mug of coffee before he joined them at their table. "I'm Dr. Roberts. I'm the surgeon who worked on Sergeant Moffitt."**

 **Troy asked, "How is he, doc?"**

" **I've seen worse. The bullet didn't puncture the lung, but it did do damage. Two cracked ribs, internal bleeding, and a partially collapsed lung from the pressure in the chest cavity. He's on his third unit of plasma and we're giving him antibiotics. He'll be on oxygen at least until he wakes up. Who taped the plastic over the wound?"**

 **Tully looked worriedly at the doctor. "Did I do the wrong thing? I thought it was a sucking chest wound."**

 **Dr. Roberts smiled. "It was, and you probably saved the sergeant's life. Where did you learn about that?"**

 **Tully shrugged. "The Red Cross handed out first aid books a while back."**

" **I've often wondered if anyone actually reads those books." Roberts finished his coffee and said, "Sergeant Moffitt will recover. In three or four days we should be able to transfer him to the base hospital at al-Ḥiǧāz."**

 **Hitch asked, "Can we see him?"**

 **Dr. Roberts shook his head. "We're going to keep him sedated for twenty-four hours. He probably won't know you're there, but you can stop by tomorrow morning to check on him."**

 **Troy nodded. "Thanks, doc. We'll do that."**

 **##########################**

 **It was 5am when Tully finally gave up trying to sleep. He had dozed some, but actual sleep refused to come. He sat up on the cot with a sigh and could hear soft snores from Troy and Hitch. Tully dressed and went out outside into the cool morning darkness. He went to the mess tent and sat down with a cinnamon roll and coffee.**

 **Tully replayed everything that had happened in his mind multiple times. He should've seen that the third halftrack was circling around. He should've gone right instead of left so he could've avoided it and Moffitt wouldn't have been shot. Tully thought silently, "Damn it! It's my job to keep my gunner safe!"**

 **He finished the cinnamon roll and another mug of coffee. It was just starting to get light outside when Tully left the mess tent. He went to the jeep and found the book that he'd seen Moffitt reading. Then he headed for the hospital tent.**

 **When Troy and Hitch walked in they found Tully sitting next to Moffitt's cot, quietly reading. They moved to his side and Troy asked, "How's it going, Tully?"**

" **It's goin', sarge. You guys read to me when I'm laid up, so I thought the least I could do was return the favor."**

 **Hitch asked, "You think he can hear you?"**

 **Tully nodded. "I hear him when he's reading. Well, maybe not all of it, but when I hear his voice … or yours or Troy's I feel more relaxed even though I'm not awake. A friendly voice goes a long way."**

 **Troy smile slightly. "Get any sleep?"**

" **A little."**

" **Why don't you let Hitch take over while you and I go get some breakfast?"**

 **Tully hesitated and Hitch put a hand on his shoulder. "Just show me where you left off."**

 **In the mess tent Troy and Tully got their food and sat down. They ate in silence for a minute as Troy watched his private. Then the sergeant said quietly, "You're still blaming yourself, aren't you?"**

 **Tully swallowed what was in his mouth and said, "I've gone over it in my head a dozen times, sarge. All I can see is what I did wrong … and that nearly got Moffitt killed."**

" **You know … hindsight is twenty-twenty."**

 **Tully looked at the sergeant confusedly. "Huh?"**

 **Troy smiled a little. "Sure, you look back on what happened and you see what went wrong. You couldn't see it when it was happening."**

" **But…"**

" **No, listen to me. Everything happens fast out here when it comes to the fighting. We're all making split-second decisions. Sometimes they're right and sometimes they're wrong. But it's the best decision you could make at the time. Every time I make a decision that gets one of you hurt, I have to realize that I made the best decision for that moment in time. Do I blame myself when someone gets hurt? Sure I do. But I can't dwell on it. I have to learn from it. Understand?"**

 **Tully nodded slowly, letting the sergeant's words sink in. He took a sip of coffee, then said, "I think I get it now. Thanks, sarge."**

 **##########################**

 **That evening Tully went to check on Moffitt. He found the sergeant awake and without the oxygen mask. He sat down and smiled. "You're looking better."**

 **Moffitt returned the smile and took short, shallow breaths as he said, "Dr. Roberts seems to think I'm going to live." The private nodded and he continued, "He also said that your quick thinking saved my life. Thank you, Tully."**

" **I'm just glad I read that first aid book."**

" **Troy was in here a little bit ago. He told me what happened. You two apparently had quite a chat this morning."**

 **Tully said, "Well, he did most of the chattin'. I just listened. And what he said made a lot of sense. I made the best decision I could at that moment. It didn't turn out very good for you, and I'm real sorry about that, but I can't keep beating myself up for it."**

 **Moffitt grinned tiredly. "Good. I'm glad you listened." He picked up the book that was lying next to him on the cot and handed it to Tully. "Now if you wouldn't mind. Hitch left off just as the story was getting good."**


End file.
